50% of the Workforce Cannot Form a Trusting Relationship: What now?

Feb 4

Last year, I read Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain by Sharon Begley and came across the concept of Attachment Theory and had a Vivid Epiphany about why larger workplaces can be so dysfunctional, about why mistrustful and judments abound once an organization reaches a certain size.

Since then, I have amassed materials from several universities.  The concept is fascinating, and I believe it is pivotal to transforming organizations into thriving, profitable communities of creative thinking.

Here is your crash course in Attachment Theory.  The research suggests that one develops their Attachment Style as a child, based on their relationship with their primary caregivers.  There are four styles:

“Secure attachment style–”It is easy for me to become emotionally close to others. I am comfortable depending on them and having them depend on me. I don’t worry about being alone or having others not accept me.”

Insecure attachment style–Dismissive: “I am comfortable without close emotional relationships. It is very important to me to feel independent and self-sufficient, and I prefer not to depend on others or have others depend on me.”

Insecure attachment style–Fearful: “I am uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to trust others completely, or to depend on them. I worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to others.”

Insecure attachment style–Preoccupied: “I want to be emotionally intimate with others, but I often find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like. I am uncomfortable being without close relationships, but I sometimes worry that others don’t value me as much as I value them.”"

Clearly, the Secure attachment style is the best for a collaborative environment.  Here’s the challenge – some studies suggest that as much as 50% of the workforce have one version of an Insecure Attachment Style.  Holy smokes, that’s half!

Attachment styles can be altered using standard brain-based coaching methods such as powerful questioning and focus of attention, and I think it is important to build individuals capacity to trust in order to create a trusting environment.  Yes or yes?

This article on AllBusiness.com was a fascinating view of how Attachment can impact the effectiveness of cross-cultural leaders.  I won’t lie to you that I wholeheartedly agreed with its findings about who a successful leader has to be in a post-Industrial Age workforce and that it reinforced how I am going to set up my Inimitable Leadership™ program.

That said, I hadn’t thought about its implication on the global or multi-cultural leader until I read this article.  This is my favorite paragraph:

“It’s not our differences that divide us; it’s our judgments about each other that do” (Wheatley, 2002). Cultural or personality differences are rarely the source of interpersonal or inter-group conflict. The most common source is what might be called “mindsets,” filters through which people view the world, self and others (e.g. Rhinesmith, 1992). Influenced by their mindsets, some people appreciate and work effectively with individual and cultural differences, while others are awkward, threatened or uncomfortable (Hopkins & Hopkins, 1998). Successful global or diversity leaders are open to new experiences and have excellent relationship skills (e.g. Black & Gregersen, 1999), drawn from their underlying positive mindsets about self and others (Manning, 2001). This paper argues that organizations which factor in these personal and cognitive criteria will select and develop more effective cross-cultural leaders, and that managers who direct change efforts towards their own mindsets can strengthen their interpersonal leadership capability.”

Folks, this mindset can be created through brain-based coaching.  Contact me today about how.

Until next time,

Carolann

Tags: Action Coach, Brain-based Coaching, business coach, Carolann Jacobs, coach, Extraordinary Results, facilitation, Inimitable Leadership, Inspired Workplace, Leadership, Legacy Leadership, Neuroleadership, neuroscience